On the first anniversary of 9/11 I was working at the state capitol building in Harrisburg, PA. As you might imagine it was a place that lent itself to ceremony. They had scheduled a number of services to comemmorate the anniversary, beginning with the "rolling requiem" in which orchestras around the world began playing at precisely the moment (local time) in which the first plane hit the World Trade Center. It was something I'd been hoping to avoid but they had set up the orchestra in the rotunda and I ended up having to pass close by at the appointed time. I stopped to listen. It seemed like an appropriate memorial to me: a thing of beauty to counteract the memory of evil; an attempt to reclaim a small piece of a day that has left small or large scars on all of our hearts, and on our soul as a nation. On the way back to my cubicle I ran into my boss. "I just want this day to be over," he said to me as he passed.
Every year on this day I experience a similar sentiment. Every year it gets a little easier. Last year I made it through most of the day without remembering what day it was. This morning I was not so fortunate. I flipped on MSNBC, as is my custom, as I sat down at my desk to begin work for the day. They were replaying their broadcast from the morning of 9/11. For a few minutes I watched even though I didn't want to, experiencing that morning all over again complete with the news anchors' discussion, speculation and sorrow. I watched all over again as a symbol of national prosperity turned into a symbol of tragedy in the space of a few moments.
Perhaps MSNBC sees this as the only way they can remember 9/11 in a "pure" sense, free of the politics of the current election cycle and free of the last seven years of hindsight. But I can't watch their broadcast. It is too painful to see it again, even after seven years. Instead I will remember the rolling requiem, and wait for this day to be over.
Star Trek The Next Generation
11 months ago
4 comments:
Ditto
It still strikes me how fresh this day is in all our hearts -- my work is not remotely related to politics but still there were little things all day -- a patient telling me they watched some of "the anniversary coverage" no need for them to say any more; someone muttering "I hate writing this date" while they're signing paperwork. I still don't know how I will ever attempt to explain what happened when Charlie is old enough to ask questions. It still breaks my heart to think about it. Did Ben say anything today?
I kept the news off even when he asked me to put it on (wanted to hear them talk about hurricane ike). I know if he'd heard anything about it on the news he would have asked what they were talking about.
We hung our flag out on 9/11/08. The sense of horror of that day still seemed fresh to me even as we hung it. What a mess we've made of it. Have we bankrupted the future of our children and grand children?
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